Shampoo Cigs & Shit Roll

I’m an image driven mod with flair

I care about the clothes I wear

Unlike some scruffy cunt who dunt care

I like to wash me fuckin’ hair


So I’m down the shops at a hasty pace

I find me-self a parking space

And can’t forget what I need to replace

So I brought a list…. just in case


I finish me fag outside the door

Of the shopping centre superstore

And quickly check me list once more

Cos I’ve already forgot what I came here for


Memories of the things we stole

We used to rob from here when we was on the dole

Another check o’ me list that’s now rolled like a scroll

It says shampoo cigs and shit roll


Well the Shampoo aisle’s a massive lane

I pace up and down again and again

Surely this stuff’s all the fuckin’ same

With a different label and a different name


I don’t know if they’re smells or flavours

Coconut and almond for party ravers

Seaweed shampoo for frequent bathers

Sun swim and gym with the holiday savers


Alberto Balsam orange and cream

Elvive nutrogloss with a tropical theme

Pantene Pro V for a guaranteed gleam

Tresemme salon silk for all colour schemes


There’s L’Oreals nourish me truly

VO5s gloss me smoothly

I’m fucked if I know if these will suit me

So I call for help from the assistant Julie


I said there’s too many types here on view

I’ve been here half an hour and i’m still looking through

There’s too many choices it’s all a to do

I just wanna buy a fuckin’ shampoo


She said Sir it’s all much more complex than that

As we entered into some follicle chat

She said what kind of hair are we looking at

I said the pubic hair round me girlfriends’ twat

…….and with that, the conversation fell …somewhat flat… did her assistance.



© words escape me 2013

About JB Barrington

The words & verse of JB Barrington; performance poet from Salford. Lovely stuff, touches heart strings and the odd raw nerve - Johnny Vegas Great poems; great delivery - Terry Christian A warm charm, a rapier wit and a real appreciation of words - Louder Than War
This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Shampoo Cigs & Shit Roll

  1. Sue Smith says:

    Pure joy for my heart.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s