JB Barrington – Woodchip Anaglypta & Nicotined Artex Ceilings

JB Barringtons book ‘Woodchip Anaglypta & Nicotined Artex Ceilings’ is now SOLD OUT

JBs new book will be out in 2019

my-book-for-wordpress

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JB Barrington Handwritten Poems

Choose any of JBs poems and have your own handwritten version, signed and personalised with a message of your choice.

Each poem will be handwritten making it a unique one off on high quality graded A4 paper ready to frame. Personalised with a message of your choice, should you require one, & each handwritten poem will be signed and dated by JB.

The above handwritten poems are £20 each inc p&p. To purchse simply use the 100% safe and secure Paypal ‘Buy Now’ button below. When you go through to checkout please enter the name of the poem you would like and also, if required, provide details of the personalised messsage you would like in the box that says ‘message to seller’


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Below are just some examples of JBs handwritten poems from previous happy customers

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Dont Look Down

Before you blame the fruit down on the ground you should first look up at the tree it fell from; the poor didn’t create poverty

JB Barrington

 

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Tomorrow is a beautiful day….

Tomorrow is a beautiful day; if you don’t believe me ask someone who’s not gonna see it

JB Barrington

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I’m coming back to Festival N°6

Honoured to be invited back to Festival N06 this year after performing to a fantastic audience on the Estuary Stage last year. This time I’m performing on the Sunday at Tim Burgess’s ‘Tim Peaks Diner’ at the Dome Gallery. Be sure to come along, heckle and say hello. JBIMG_20160407_190331

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JB at Festivals 2016 – Kendal Calling & Festival No6

Catch me on the main stage at Kendal Calling Thursday 28th July then the Carvetti Stage on the Friday. I’m also performing as part of Tim Burgess’s Tim Peaks Diner at Festival No6 in September

IMG_20160714_195451IMG_20160711_135111IMG_20160407_190331

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JB & Shakespeare an’ that

So, I was asked by BBC Radio Manchester to write a poem for the 400th anniversary of Shakespeare, William Shakespeare that is (obviously) or just Bill to those still living that knew him well (and there’s a few…or so it would seem)… anyway, the BBC wanted a modern day version of a Shakespeare classic…..and they asked me!!! Now I’m sure you can imagine my initial response once I’d pick myself up off the floor …..Shakespeare?? Me?? Have you got the wrong number?? I’m the fella that still gets the balcony scene from Romeo & Juliet confused with Rapunzel (true dat) ….. but yes, they wanted me to re-write one of Shakespeare’s well known pieces……. so…. i did it, i really did it…i re-wrote a scene from Romeo & Juliet in a Salford/Manchester styleee bringing up to date (or summat).
So I’m off to Salfords BBC Media City this Thursday to film the poem which you’ll get to hear/see very soon. I do hope you like it….. I’m sure Bill will
JB

Click the link below to hear/view the finished poem…. enjoy

Red Romeo & Blue Julie

 

 

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Take Them Fuckin’ Sunglasses Off

Take them fuckin sunglasses off
The sun’s outside you tool
Take them fuckin sunglasses off
You’re confusing cunt with cool
Take them fuckin sunglasses off
Surely you can’t see
Take them fuckin sunglasses off
You’re not Lennie from Peters & Lee
Take them fuckin sunglasses off
It’s a look we all deplore
Take them fuckin sunglasses off
Lose those delusions of grandeur
Take them fuckin sunglasses off
Them shades are a shameful blunder
Take them fuckin sunglasses off
You’re not Roy Orbison or Stevie Wonder
Take them fuckin sunglasses off
Your room is dimly lit
Take them fuckin sunglasses off
It’s dark in there you tit

© JB Barrington 2015 © words escape me 2015

Sunglasses 02

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Adipose An’ Affection

what’s he supposed to say?
to “does me arse look fat in these?”
should he always safely say “no way!”
whilst the weight buckles the knees
when she’s obviously gettin’ bigger
does he tell her she’s lookin’ grand
should he tell her she’s an hourglass figure
that could do wiv a little less sand
what’s she supposed to say?
when his belly blocks the view of his cock
never one to want to cause dismay
she’ll iron his shirt on a wok
what does it really matter?
should anyone really care?
if either or both grow fatter
as long as a love lives there

© JB Barrington 2015
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Do I look fat

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JB Barrington – Live Shows

Friday 12th June in Hull at Union Mash Up

Tickets: https://www.ticketsource.co.uk/date/162468

Hull Union Mash Up Poster 12th June

Friday 26th June in St.Helens at The Central Library

Tickets: http://www.eventbrite.com/o/sthelens-arts-service-6993926163

JB Poster St Helens v3

Saturday 25th July in Salford as part of the Greater Manchester Fringe

Salford Arts Theatre: Tickets: https://www.ticketsource.co.uk/event/88070

JB Barrington Mcr Fringe Poster 2015_07_25 SalfordArts

Saturday 14th November in Macclesfield at Bollington Arts Centre

Tickets: http://bollingtonartscentre.org.uk/pages/events.php?event=557

JB Barrington Bollington Arts Poster v2

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